Ready for Change? Here's Some Advice.
Since we're a third of the way through 2008 it seems like a good time to talk about change and transition. Many of you might be well on your way to making your goals for the year a reality, while the rest of us might still be in that thinking about it mode. There's no right or wrong here. I, for one, am on my way, but not as fast as I thought I'd be. Frustrating, but not worth making myself wrong over it. It is what it is!
With change, there are days when everything seems great about where we're headed. And in an instant it feels like failure because we're not where we thought we would be. And that's the way the change process works. It has phases, and each one is important and lasts as long as it lasts. Here are the 5 phases.
Take Stock. This is about noticing. It's the stage where you might not be fully aware that things aren't the way you'd like them to be, but you have a feeling - a sense - that something isn't quite right. If that's the case for you, take stock of the different aspects of your life - work, finances, home/family relationships, community/social, and self/personal by checking to see if that sense of excitement or energy you once felt is as great as it ever was, lessened or even gone. Use a 1 to 5 rating scale with 5 being "Just the way I'd like it to be" to 1 "Not working." If you're in the 1 or 2 category on one or more of those areas, you might be in the very early stage of change. You don't need to know yet what, specifically, that you'd like to change, if even IF you'd want anything to change. You're simply taking time to notice. In this phase, realizations might occur as you take the time to reflect.
Think, but not for too long. Here you've got some clarity and probably a name to what you'd like to be different in your life - more leadership responsibility, different job, change of career, a life outside of work, a better personal relationship - but you haven't moved on it yet. Being in a state of contemplating change before we actually do it is a good thing. But don't wait too long. Opportunities slip by fast. A way to help yourself move beyond this stage is to experience how you'll feel if you never do what you want most. Really get into it and feel what you'd miss. Often this is just the nudge needed to get going on making change happen. But even when you know you're ready, don't rush into action right away. You need more than a vision; you need a plan. And that you'll design when you're in the next phase.
Map It Out. Here you go from "I'll do it someday" to "I'm doing it now." A good feeling. Research shows that going from the "thinking about it" stage immediately to the action mode is the quickest way to hit a wall of resistance and quit before you've made any headway. And this is exactly what we do. We leap before we know what we're jumping into. This is the phase NOT for taking action, but for visualization and planning. See where it is you want to go. Be specific. Write it down. Tell others to make it real. Then design the plan that will get you there, complete with what you need from others to make it happen. The mapping it out phase doesn't need to be complex or take too long, but you do need to do it, even if you just jot a few notes about it. In the plan include a time frame, your first few activities, and a list of one or two potential or real barriers that might stop you. Only when you know your barriers can you then do something about them. And doing something about them becomes part of your plan.
Get Going. This is where your vision and plan become real. And it's just when you're likely to hit your own personal wall of resistance. Why? Because you're in transition - that uncomfortable place where you're no longer where you were, but you're not yet where you want to be. The ups and downs of this transition process are what cause people to slow down, shrink their goals, or just give up. I recommend reading one Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes, 25th Anniversary Addition, by William Bridges. We can use all the help we can get during this stage. But if you stick with it and roll with the difficulties, you'll be on the other side and in what Bridges calls, New Beginnings pretty quickly.
Cruise Control. Where the new becomes the now. You've stepped into your vision and it's feeling real to you. Now what? The work here is to stay long enough with what you've accomplished before starting on your next big something else. Celebrate it. Revel in it. Enjoy every moment of it. You thought about the change you wanted to make, planned for it, acted on it. It's yours to be lived, fully.
Change is a cyclical process. Before long you'll again feel a stirring and the next stage of your life's journey will reveal itself. Enjoy.
About the Author. Denise Brouillette is the President of Hairpin Turns, career strategists for women. Denise has been an executive coach and leadership development expert to leaders in high tech, finance, biotech and health care since 1994 and specializes in helping professional women master power, politics and influence in work. Read Denise's bio, see our client list, and read what clients say.
